the actual cringe

look,,, i dont get to control what my brain goes insane about

as of writing this, i only have the one guy that puts my brain in a blender every time i think about him, but there have been many along the way...

Thomas Shelby; Peaky Blinders

i know. just fucking kill me already. in my defense, this is the perfect guy for the girlies that love a pathetic gangleader wet shellshocked horsegirl boy. not sure if that's what a lot of people are after, but if that's your thing, he's the guy. only reason i want a season 7 is so that i can kill him with my bare hands. seasons 3 and 6 are really the show's high points imo (i still love the others tho) but he is fantastic as a character the whole way through.
side note: i'm in love with lizzy so much
i first watched peaky blinders in autumn 2020 and from day one it has been a little worm in my brain. tbh i was already on my cillian murphy kick a little bit before i watched this (i put it off bc the netflix trailer for it was very much not appealing to me, but i caved eventually) thanks to some god-awful twitter fancam??? of his roles in different movies??? i hadnt seen a fancam outside of the kpop context before, so it confused the hell out of me but also had me intrigued. say what you want, good or bad, the man has a face. since then, i have rewatched the series like 4.5 times? 4 fully, and then the last half of it again. will hopefully be watching the first half soon to even it out (also bc i neeeeed to. havent watched an episode since june '22). i've only seen the last season twice though, since it came out earlier this year. anyways, i dont know how to earnestly talk about my thoughts and feelings about him other than saying that i love an arrogant self-sacrificing bastard who puts his family above everything and yet is still an absent father, so tbh i'm not going to try. here's this:

^dall.e pic^


^me & him, but w/ blood^

Placement character

tommy is really the only character in my head at the moment tbh, which is some ways makes life easier, but on the other hand, it forces all my potential blorbo energy into a singular guy. i want this box here just to show the outline that i want for this page (character 1 floats left, 2 floats right, 3 left, etc). i guess i can mention that my summer 2020 obsession was nbc hannibal, and that the first animes i watched are still very dear to my heart (ouran + fruits basket).